Friday, December 7, 2012

Review: 13 Seconds (2003)

Fuckin shoot yourself in the head before you decide to watch this garbage. What's incredible with this shit storm is it actually ended up in Blockbuster! How bad is it? The dialogue doesn't even match the actor's lips! Yes, it may as well be a foreign film dubbed in English to kill us all. I'd rather have a space parasite harvest my organs for breakfast than try to sit through this bore fest. Their idea of acting is playing some full-retard robot with no soul. Hell, that's an insult to robots! You really can't understand how horrible acting can be until you've seen this, and the writing that comes out of these people's mouths will have you making a Ringu face of death. If you find this lurking about in a store or some smelly bargain bin, don't make eye contact. Run as fast and as far away as you can. It's the only hope you have of saving yourself. Don't you dare be fooled by those fake we-made-our-own-film-festival awards on the cover or any half-assed paid-off reviews. The twist at the end is fuckin stupid and just proves you've wasted your time.